Recently my friend Kerry told me a story about some of her friends. It went something like this.
Her friends, a couple, were on a cruise enjoying themselves. They met another couple at the bar. They all started chatting and having a good time together. Their new friends bought them a round of drinks that were served in fancy pineapple cups. Kerry’s friends accepted these drinks as a friendly gesture. And everyone carried on with the lovely time they were having, pineapple cups in hand.
A few minutes later their new friends shifted the conversation. They started talking logistics and asking presumptuous questions:
“So how do you want to do this?” And
“When is a good time?” And
“Should we go to our room or yours?”
Stuff like that.
Kerry’s friends were confused. Turns out those fancy drinks in pineapple cups were not just fancy drinks in pineapple cups. They were a secret invitation to swing. By accepting the drinks from their new friends, they were essentially saying, “Hell yeah we’re down! Let’s bang each others’ partners. That sounds great!”.
However, at the time Kerry’s friends had no idea that that’s what the pineapple cups meant. They thought that these nice people bought them drinks just because.
After the confusion settled in, Kerry’s friends declined the invitation. Their new friends were shocked and mad.
“Why did you accept the drinks if you didn’t want to get down? Everyone know what pineapples mean!”
“Sorry. We didn’t know. But thanks for the drinks.”
Until I heard that story, I also was unaware of the secret significance of the pineapple. But apparently it is indeed a thing that almost everyone knows about. It’s a crazy world out there.
A few days later I came across this article — “Spain’s ‘pineapple-gate’ sparks hopes of romance and shop chaos”
The article states that the pineapple craze has expanded beyond the swinger-verse. Single people are now going to the grocery store and strolling the isles with upside down pineapples in their carts in search of others that would be down for some sexy times.
It’s total madness out there! I will never look at a pineapple the same way again.
I’m excited to put my new found pineapple knowledge to use. There is a nice selection of pineapples at MacPherson’s (my neighborhood fruit stand).
I shop there about twice a week. Next time I go I will be on the lookout. Pineapple-dar activate!
Anyhow, there was no way I was not going to write a song about this.
The song is called “Upside Down Pineapple”. It’s less a song and more a public pineapple service announcement (PPSA).
It’s the seventh song off my newest album One In A Row. For a little bit more than the price of a pineapple you can buy the album from my Bandcamp page. Your support is much appreciated.
Enjoy!
Upside Down Pineapple
By Mike Votava
Go on a cruise
make some new friends
they got something special on their minds
how was I to know?
Upside down pineapple
Saturday night at the grocery store
cruising the wine section for some ass
this is how you know
Upside down pineapple
Not everything is just the thing you think it is
there is a code
a way to advertise
take a giant swing
you’re good to go
More than a fruit
It’s a beacon of romance
meet someone who’s looking for your love
everybody knows
Upside down pineapple
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